A well dressed Parisian walks down the street, perfectly coiffed and bronzed from a recent trip to Marseilles, pointed shoes clicking on the cobblestones, his adams apple rising just above his expertly tied, brightly patterned scarf.
Oh, yes. I have to ask myself this question many, many times a day:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=PpFlR5t4WGw
Once upon a time, not long after AH and I had begun our courtship, he showed me a picture of a Certain Young Man. Upon seeing CYM, this conversation transpired:
Me: Hmm, does he have a girlfriend?
AH: Not that I know of...
Me: Has he ever had a girlfriend?
AH: I think he went to prom with a girl.
Me: Yep, he's gay.
AH: He is not!
Me: Yes, he is. He's an attractive college guy with no girlfriend, and he's CARRYING A MANPURSE.
Turns out, Certain Young Man is, in fact, gay. Ah, there was a time in my not-so-distant past that the presence of a manpurse or a scarf tied with a bit of extra flourish was a dead give-away. But it's things like this that throw my gay-dar into total flux:
That, my friends, is (in addition to one disapproving security guard) the inside of BHV Homme. For some context, BHV is the closest thing to a Macy's in Paris, so it's pretty mainstream. So this is no niche boutique tucked back in the Marais; this is a major department store, and they have an ENTIRE MANPURSE SECTION. Not just a few "laptop bags" quietly tucked away somewhere, not just a few more gender-neutral options hiding in amongst the ladies' handbags. Nope, options, variety...normalcy.
For the record, now that I've got AH shackeld to me forevermore (lovingly, I hope), my gaydar no longer has a purpose as I no longer need to sort potential mates from potential Project Runway-watching buddies. However, Europe's way of screwing with my American-grown preconceptions of masculinity has had some interesting results. One of these has been the way that AH and I think about what constitutes appropriate clothing for men. AH, being a physics type, has never been one to venture much beyond: A) functional clothes that he can fix lasers in, and B) slightly nicer clothes that I force him to buy so that we can be seen in public together. (Yes, this may sound shrewish and cliche, a woman who dresses her man. But ask me sometime what AH wore on our first date. I DARE YOU). But not long after moving here, he (of his own volition!) suggested that it was time to replace the ratty Old Navy scarf that I had bought for him the first Christmas we were dating. He even suggested buying something that (again, *gasp*) might cost more than 5 euros! And (*GASPGASPGASP*) something with pattern and/or color!!
And then he realized that he didn't want to spend 50 euros on a scarf that would get him mocked ceaselessly when we return home.
And you know what was extra fun? Finding myself in the middle of a conversation about this very subject with a (very well-dressed) Frenchman at church and trying not to sound like an asshat:
Me: It's so nice that men dress up so much here!
Frenchy: Do men not dress nicely in America?
Me: It's not that they look like slobs, but men typically don't want to appear as though they've put thought into the way that the look.
Frenchy: Why not?
Me: Well, because people might assume things about them...
Frenchy: *Not getting it* Like what?
Me: *Oh noes* like, who they like to date. Or, you know, not date.
Frenchy:....
Me: Um, ifamandresseswellinAmericapeoplethinkit'sbecausehelikesdatingothermen.
Frenchy: *Pause* OH! *Pause* Why?
A terrific question! And one that I am, sadly, in no way equipped to answer. However, I will end with one final plea: can manpurses PLEASE begin to make an appearance in more American men's closets? Because I'll bet that Frenchwomen never return home with their purses ten pounds heavier because they've spent their evening hearing, "babe, can you just put this in your purse?". So c'mon, American Dudes, man up and buy a purse. You'll be giving your lady a break, and yourself some European mystique.
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